December 09, 2013


"..time, as we know it, is a dimension we experience only in one direction. but what if one of the additional dimension wasnt spacial, but temporal?  
if you mix the mash potatoes and sauce, you cant separate them later, it's forever. the smoke comes from daddy's cigarette but it never goes back in. we cannot go back, that's why its hard to choose. 
you have to make the right choice. as long as you dont choose, everything remains possible." -Nemo Nobody
 this is one of my favourite quotes from the movie Mr Nobody, starring Jared Leto. it talks about life and possibilities. where no path is the wrong one, but choices we make today, can greatly affect our future. 

so how do you define a bad choice? truth is, we make choices every single minute. even writing this post, is a choice.

i had my share of choices. 7 years ago, i made my choice to screw Biology (got a B) and set my ways into engineering, the last thing i want to go to since i was a kid. i think machinery and mathematics sucks (except for PlayStation). and looking back, it made me what i am today, a networking student (computer networking for you) and i love every part of it. even sometimes it frustrates me having to calculate every possibility, but the satisfaction when everything is up and running greatly. you know that feeling when you are not sure what you want to study, but you study anyways since everyone is doing it? no longer feeling it.

"...what if i went studying earlier, and i didn't went to work for a year? would i be in UK for my masters right now? and would i meet all these incredible friends in BMI? if i took up UiTM offer, would i have meet all these GEL members?"

its easy to say, "dah ditakdirkan hidup kita begini.." but i always constantly thinking about these What Ifs. would i be in a better position if i took the other road, let's say. like the quote before, time is a concept where it goes one way and does not come back, that is why these thoughts haunt me.

time travelling seems tempting when you made a choice you did not want to. i would not want to call it as a mistake, because mistakes are just a concept. losing something, losing someone precious, we want to go back in time and redo everything so we won't lost anything something we love so dearly. but life is a learning process and one can't learn when he has not lost anything.

talking about someone we love, we also had the choices not to know someone, but we meet he or she instead and we finally love them, but in the end, we lost them. its a choice. we have the choice not to love them, but we did. why it is so hard to choose not to love? because emotion clouds our judgement. and thus the question, why we were fated to meet them. so why we were fated to meet them again? because what is left is just misery and sorrow.

but that is how we learn. we learn not to repeat the same actions and choices. we learn to know who appreciates us and we learn to appreciate them. we learn to make the best choices (at the time) and we strive for success with our choices. when we fail to achieve our choice's objective, stand up straight and pick another road. 

to be independent, to be love, to love, to buy, to eat, to sleep, to drink, to be a racist, to be intelligent, to pray, to watch TV, to write a blogpost, to rant on twitter, to share, to start over whenever point in our life, IT IS ALL ABOUT CHOICES.

i always open up to the concept of possibilities. where we can do whatever we want, as long as we want to. at this age, most of my friends are getting married, having kids. but for me life is a possibility to be explored, how far can i go, or where will i end up going places before settling down. or maybe this is an excuse for not having a girlfriend. who knows....

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